Thoughts on a Rainy Weekend

The rain has settled in for the remainder of today. 

My windows are open. There is a rhythmic drip, drip that falls from the gutters. Cars splash through water that has collected along the street. David has found the perfect jazz station to set a reflective tone for the remainder of our day. 

Rainy days at home call for snuggles, hot coffee, dogs by your side and time for reflection. 

My friend Sherrie is not a fan of rainy days. I don’t mind them as much. It seems that with age, I satisfy my soul with a healthy dose of introversion. So a steady rain helps me.   

I won’t lie, Reader. This has been a tough week. 

This time of year is hectic at work and it seems that I can’t find my way above the never-ending list of things to accomplish. I know David has felt the same with projects and deadlines. The week even took its toll on Grace and Anna. They ran in two track meets on Thursday and Saturday. Exhausted – all of us. 

But even with everything going on, God has sprinkled lessons, hope, wisdom and just enough comfort to remind me that He is there and able. All I must do is believe. 

  

On Thursday, I was part of a three person team sent to a local university to represent my school district at an education Job Fair. To be honest, the timing of this little trip was terrible. I had so many things at work that needed my attention and I felt distracted when we first arrived. But as the afternoon progressed and we met with almost 80 students who are just a few weeks from graduating, I felt caught up in their excitement for the opportunity to be part of the community of educators. They didn’t bemoan and complain about the high stakes accountability for teachers based on students’ test scores; nor did they talk about the frustrations when parents refuse to take responsibility for their children and want to blame the schools; I never heard one of these young people feel defeated by a public perception that public educators are failing or that people discount how hard we work. 

I heard none of that. Instead, I heard enthusiasm and a determination to make a difference in the life of a child, no matter what. They didn’t ask about salaries and benefits. They asked about opportunity and the chance to leave a mark on someone’s life. 

Suddenly, I was transported back to 1993 when I too was a giddy, idealistic 22 year old, ready to set a blazing trail of knowledge in every class I taught. Yes, our work is hard. Yes, it takes everything out of me from time to time. But it is good work. It is necessary work. 

That same evening, David and I watched Grace and Anna as they competed in a county-wide track and field meet.  These two creatures, who are the very reasons I am a mom, amazed and astounded me with the grit and determination they brought to the track that night. One picture that David captured of Grace, shows a fierceness and perseverance to complete the race before her – no matter what. I couldn’t have been more proud of them at that competition and the one they found themselves in on Saturday. They amaze and humble me. Being their mom has made me a better person. 

While sitting in the stands at CAK yesterday, we struck up a conversation with a couple whose son was running for Bearden H.S. Track team. David and I had watched this young man’s performance, speed and agility with awe all afternoon. Our conversation with Mr and Mrs Foster was special, to say the least. They have been married for 26 years, have two sons who not only are successful in sports but academically as well. They both had an infectious laughter and ease between them as a couple – down to earth. I thought of them later as David and I ate dinner. Odds are, we will never cross paths again. But their love story and friendship was so encouraging to us – the 6 month newlyweds. 

  

While our newlywed love story received some encouragement yesterday,  earlier in the week, a childhood friend of mine announced that she and her husband had made the painful decision to divorce. 

My heart immediately broke for her and her family. She was courageous and announced their decision publicaly on Facebook so as to avoid other people’s careless assumptions about their private life. 

Many years ago, I didn’t have that kind of courage. As a result, my private life was chewed up into little pieces and  spit back at me by small town gossip. That is hard to recover from. What I dread for my friend is the inevitable awkwardness that will accompany this break-up. Friends and family members won’t want to take sides and yet they will. Conversations and interactions – even simple mannerly greetings will be awkward. Some people will have the maturity and courage to do what is right in their treatment of you – others will not. 

I used to take such treatments personally. Age and experience have taught me that such encounters are a reflection of the other person and not me. Case in point: Yesterday  at the track meet, David and I were completely ignored by a couple that mean the world  to us. Completely. We both tried to get their attention to say “Hello”, but our efforts were ignored I’m sure it was directly related to who they were sitting with. But it was so obvious, even my daughters noticed. This observation elicited a barrage of questions as to why they would so blatantly ignore us in public. I could not give them an answer that would satisfy or help them to understand all of the complexities of the situation.  I sat there and tried to imagine any possible scenario where David or I would purposefully ignore them and to be honest, I couldn’t think of one. I reminded myself that this was a reflection of them and not of us. 

I later discovered that one of those people had sent me a text saying they weren’t trying to offend anyone – it was just an awkward situation. I chose not to respond but ponder and acknowledge the hurt I felt. The situation has been awkward for a number of years but this was the first time we were ignored entirely. Offended? No. Hurt? Without a doubt. 

 

Mostly today, I am reflective and grateful for the simple things I do have that make my life colorful and more wonderful than I feel I deserve. 

Today, I am thankful that I married my best friend – he always has my back, his love is deeper than any ocean, he makes me laugh and I feel safe in his hugs. 

Today I am amazed at my two daughters who show me more about life than I could ponder alone. 

Today, I am grateful for friends and family who are simply the best at making me laugh and encouraging me to be better than I thought possible. 

Today, on this rainy Sunday, it is good to be alive. 

Be blessed…..