A New Year and Two Revelations

“And now we welcome the new year, full of things that have never been”
― Rainer Maria Rilke

“The chief beauty about time
is that you cannot waste it in advance.
The next year, the next day, the next hour are lying ready for you,
as perfect, as unspoiled,
as if you had never wasted or misapplied
a single moment in all your life.
You can turn over a new leaf every hour
if you choose.”
― Arnold Bennett

“This is a new year. A new beginning. And things will change.”
― Taylor Swift

The ushering in of a new year has rarely been celebrated by me; at least in the more “traditional” way. When the ball drops on Times Square, I am usually in my bed fast asleep; you won’t see me donning a new party dress, or scrambling to find a mouth upon which to lay my most delicate kiss at the stroke of midnight.

Endings and beginnings are always a time of reflection for me. I believe it is important to “take stock” in my life – a time to learn, grow, and then move forward. Moving forward to your best self is necessary but can only happen after we do some honest inventory. Taking an inventory has never been much of a problem for me, it has always been the honest part. By honest, I mean seeing things for what they truly are and not what I wanted them to be.

So my recent musings and reflections have produced two revolutionary thoughts to sum up 2012. Are you ready, reader?

1. Things change.
2. Life goes on.

Bet you weren’t expecting that now, huh? Ok. Ok. I’m being a tad sarcastic and I apologize. In all honesty, that’s really it in a nutshell.

Things/people/circumstances will change whether we want them to/expect them to or not. I have changed. It wasn’t anything I had necessarily planned on, but it happened. My experiences have broken open, my knowledge has been used and stretched, my paradigm has shifted, my responsibilities have increased, and my own self worth has increased as I have really taken the time to get to know myself through my eyes, not through anyone else’s.
My realm of influence has shifted beyond my classroom walls to stretch forth and include so many more. This change has left me vulnerable, emotionally/mentally spent, and yet fulfilled in ways I never thought possible.
My landscape has shifted. People have moved in and out of my circle. Those that have left have touched my life forever and will live on in the quiet memories of our time together. Those who have entered, bring their own gifts of friendship to me and I am excited at how their influence will add to the colors of my life.
The people around me have changed as well. My daughters are growing into these beautiful little ladies with their own outlook on life, dreams, and accomplishments. They are reflecting themselves out into the world and are looking to find their own place in it.

My own little world has been changed in a variety of ways. Some of those changes I was willing to usher in with excitement and a sense of wonder/adventure; others left me without any solid footing – angry and confused.

Realizing that life goes on is, to me, the hardest part to come to grips with amidst great changes, especially those that I had no idea were coming. I admit that those particular areas have been met with great resistance from me. I have gone through the cycle of disbelief, anger, sadness, more anger, trying to accept, back to disbelief….on and on, until you wake one morning to realize that this fighting and resistance has been futile. The calendar pages have flipped, time has moved on and you have chosen to sit on the riverbank of life waiting for the remnants of what you had to come floating by; when it had long since been carried away on life’s current and lost in the sea.
That realization is both sad and freeing all in one. Sad for what is lost, but by letting go, you are free to accept the next great thing that will open your world up beyond anything you could have imagined.

Reader, I wish I could offer more earth shattering revelations about my reflections from 2012. Truth is, it all comes down to those two realizations: things change; and, life goes on. The challenge comes in accepting those two facts and being courageous enough to let go and let life take you where you are meant to travel. Wherever you find yourself today, that is exactly where you are meant to be. God is working through your life’s circumstances to make you into the best version of yourself possible. Trust His plan, His timing, and that whatever happens, it always works out for the best. Always. Life’s great adventure isn’t waiting for you down the road. Life’s great adventure is found right here, right now, in this very moment. Are you living it? Because if you aren’t, you will wake up one day to find that things have changed, and life has gone on. Don’t be left behind. Go with it.

Live well….now and in this new year to come.